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Love Our Talks
I'm your host KLove, we dive into juicy topics about love, relationships, dating, wellness and entertainment. We will also have special guests that will join the conversation.
Love Our Talks
Are You Living or Existing in Your Relationship???
Do you ever feel like you're just going through the motions in your relationship? On Love Our Talks, we explore the critical distinction between merely existing and truly living with your partner. Join me, K-Love, as we unravel the nuances that make a partnership vibrant and meaningful. We're diving into the reality that while many couples maintain the facade of togetherness, they might be missing out on the genuine connection that makes relationships worthwhile.
Listen in as we share honest insights and strategies to break free from the monotony and transform your relationship from being more like roommates to lovers who live and love out loud.
Thank you joining Love Our Talks and listening to these juicy topics!
Hey, loves, welcome back to Love Our Talks, the podcast where we dive into all things juicy about love, relationships and everything in between. I'm your host, k-love. If you tuned in last time, you know we broke down how to watch out for manipulating red flags, but today we're diving into something that makes you sit back and think, and I want you to also look at relationships around you as well. So the topic of today is are you living or existing, or are you just existing in your relationship? Because there's a big difference between the two. Okay, and we're going to break down everything. We're just going to break it all down for you. So go ahead, grab your wine, your tea, your coffee or whatever makes you feel good, because I got mine all right, let's go ahead and jump right on into it.
Speaker 1:So let's talk about what it really means to live in your relationship versus just existing. And I'm sure y'all have seen this before. The couples who are just there. I mean they're together, but they're not really together, and you know what I mean. They're doing all the things that make them a couple, like living together, raising kids, going to family gatherings but there's no passion, no spark, no real enjoyment of each other's company. I've seen it with my own two eyes myself. I see it around me Friends and family for sure. They're just existing, day in and day out, going through the motions, keeping up with the appearances and maybe even convincing themselves that this is just how relationships are supposed to be. But let me tell you something this is not what relationships are about. Relationships are supposed to be fulfilling, fun and vibrant, right? I mean? They're supposed to add life to your life, not to make you feel like you're dragging through the days. I mean that's what I call living in your relationship. When you're living, you feel connection, you show your love and it's not just for social media or to appease other people, right, I mean you genuinely enjoy being around each other, and that shows up in the way you talk, the way you laugh and love together. Okay, you're out there living out loud and loving out loud. That's powerful, right there. That's powerful. Now let's get honest. For a second right. Not that we're not being honest, but come with me here Are you really living in your relationship or are you existing?
Speaker 1:Here are some things to look out for. If you're not sure, you know one thing is you just going through the motions? If it feels like your relationship is more of a routine and a choice, where you're just doing things because you have to, not because you really want to. That's the red flag, y'all. That's the red flag.
Speaker 1:So when was the last time you planned something together or even had a conversation that didn't revolve around what's for dinner, okay, or who's picking up the kids, mm-hmm, you know you don't feel excited anymore. Remember when just hearing their voice used to give you tingles, right. Or even just getting a text message, you start smiling all giddy and stuff, you know, and it will make your heart just kind of skip a beat. If you're struggling to remember the last time you felt that kind of excitement or even look forward to spending time together, that could be a sign you're just existing. You know you could be like you're more like roommates than lovers and I'm talking about living together but you're living separately. You know it's like y'all are in the same space but emotionally in different worlds. You're doing your own thing, living like parallel lives and only coming together when it's absolutely necessary, which is crazy, that's not. No, you avoid like quality time together. Now, this one's real If you're constantly finding reasons to be away from each other, whether it's working late, spending time with your friends, or you sitting on the couch binge watching Netflix by yourself, that's a sign, because quality time should be something you crave, not something you avoid, not something you avoid. So if you're listening to all of this and just thinking, dang, that sounds like me. Look, don't worry, you are not alone and you can change it. You definitely could change that. If you're willing to do that, if you truly value the relationship that you have and you are committed to this person, you can change that. So let's get into some tips on how to go from just existing in your relationship to truly living it out and loving it out loud.
Speaker 1:Okay, so number one thing is bring back the playfulness. Remember when you first started dating and y'all would do silly things together, just fun, you know, just for the fun of it. Bring back that energy For real. Try new things together, whether it's going on spontaneous dates, trying a new hobby or even having a game night at your house. I mean, people still do play board games yeah, they do and even have games online that you can join with couples. Right, the point is to have fun and break out of that monotony, pretty much.
Speaker 1:Number two you want to really check in with each other regularly, not every blue moon, and what I mean by that? I don't just mean how hey, how's your day, or you know, something like that. I mean really check in, ask that person, how are you feeling about us, or what's something we could do more of. You know, when you make space for these deeper conversations, it creates a stronger emotional connection. Seriously, it really does. I also, number three I want you to be intentional about intimacy, and I'm not just talking about sex, although that's important too. I'm talking about, like, touching, hugging, holding hands and cuddling, any kind of physical connection that makes your partner feel wanted. Little gestures of love, trust me, trust me, little gestures of love, trust me, trust me, it can go a long way in making your partner feel seen and appreciated.
Speaker 1:And number four communicate your needs, though. You know your needs and your desires, because if you're feeling like something is missing, yo say something. Don't just sit there silent like you got your lips zipped together. You know they taped shut. Don't do that. That's not going to help you and it's definitely not going to help them, because they're not a mind reader. Now, if you feel as though, like you know, you're saying something, it'll start like some argument, like some mess. Then that's a problem, that's a red flag, because if you can't communicate your feelings to the person that you're sharing a space with, you're sharing a bed with, that's a problem. Yeah, now, a lot of us assume our partners know, like I said, what we want and what we need. But if you haven't told them, how are they supposed to know? Tell me how you have to open up about what you need more of in the relationship and be willing to listen to your partner's needs as well.
Speaker 1:It's a two-way street boo. It's a two-way street Number five treat. Number five QT quality time. Make time for each other. Schedule it if you have to, because life, you know, is busy, and if you're not making time to connect and present you know things with your partner, it's going to be hard to build a relationship that's truly alive. I mean, if you have to plan your date nights, somebody's got to do it right. Plan regular date nights, weekend getaways or even just an hour each week where y'all just sit down, unplug your phones, devices, your mind, just detach. I know you can't detach your head right from your body, but you know what I mean and just focus on each other. That goes a long way. And number six is fun. You want to celebrate each other's wins. I mean, celebrate each other's wins. A part of living out loud in your relationship is supporting and celebrating each other's successes. You know, it could be a small win at work, hitting a personal goal or even just getting through a tough week, because celebrating together brings joy and a sense of shared accomplishment. All right.
Speaker 1:So again I question you to ask yourself are you living or existing in your relationship? Now that I broke down the difference between the two, kind of figure that out. Where are you? And if you're just existing, what are you going to do to change it? And remember your relationship should be a source of joy, growth and connection, because if it feels more like a chore, then it's time to do some work.
Speaker 1:Yes, you know, love is meant to be felt Truly. It is Not just something you say or do. Love is meant to be felt Truly. It is Not just something you say or do you know. It's all about taking small steps every day to bring that life and excitement back into your relationship. If that's what you really want, if you really want that person, you got to give as well, so that you know you're both feeling fulfilled, happy and connected.
Speaker 1:Because who wants to be in a lifeless you know relationship or marriage? That's not good, it's not good at all. And if your relationship is worth it, then you got to work it and stop making excuses. Don't put that on that other person. If you have the power to make a change or shift or do something about it, do it. Do it, show effort, because if something happens and you walk away from this relationship, at least you can say to yourself you gave it all that you can, 100%. You put in that effort. Okay, all right, you know.
Speaker 1:Well, that's it for today's episode of Love, our Talks, and I hope you found something in this message that resonates with you and if it sparks some, you know, real change in your relationship. I really hope it does, because I'm out here I'm really trying to, you know, help better relationships with the information that I have, with the wisdom that I have. I've been in a relationship for 20 years and I've been married. I am married and so you know you have to be willing to work together. I cannot stress that enough. You can't give up, you know, if that's what you truly want. If that person is a good person, fight for it, continue to fight for it and continue to fight for it after that. Okay, so be sure to follow for more relationship tips and advice and heart to heart combos. So until next time, keep loving and living out loud, you guys, and thank you, thank you, thank you again for tuning in y'all.
Speaker 1:If you love this episode, don't forget to like, share and subscribe, because guess what y'all? I'm really trying to grow this podcast and you know I want to get to a place where we're big out here in the world. If my voice or if information or anything that you grasp from me, let's spread it. I am on all social media platforms, um, so you know I got tips on tiktok as well. You can find me there, um, yeah, you can definitely find me there, um, so let's, like I said, keep the conversation going in the comments on social media and tell me are you living or existing in your relationship? I love to hear from you. So, like I said, until next time with Love, our Talks. I'm your host, k Love, and I'll see you on the next episode. But you know what? Wait, wait, wait, just real quick. Like I said, we're on all streaming platforms. We're on Spotify, itunes, apple Podcasts, iheartradio. We're on Google Podcasts Also, like I said, you can find us on all streaming platforms.
Speaker 1:And remember one thing, too, I have to leave you with this Each day holds the promise of a new beginning, you guys. So be better, right, do better and love harder than the day before, because, guess what? Your best days aren't behind you, they're being written today. So keep moving forward, because, guess what? Your potential is limitless. You can do anything. You put your mind to your effort to Okay, faith that works is dead. You believe in yourself. Believe that you're higher power. If it's God, okay, because I believe in God. God, but you can do anything. You're limitless. You just have to believe, right. Well, I love you guys, until next time. Like I said, bye.